


give me a memory i can use

by ofcomputernerdsandsoufflegirls



Series: (not so) daily damerey [4]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/M, Family, Feelings, Post-Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker, Prompt Fic, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-16
Updated: 2020-01-16
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:01:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,489
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22276762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ofcomputernerdsandsoufflegirls/pseuds/ofcomputernerdsandsoufflegirls
Summary: Following her fight with Palpatine, Rey begins to receive long-lost memories of her family and one certain memory causes her to think.-------'There will be boys who will tell you you’re beautiful, but only a few will see you.'
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Rey
Series: (not so) daily damerey [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1595158
Comments: 4
Kudos: 68
Collections: Damerey Daily 2020





	give me a memory i can use

**Author's Note:**

> for day 15 of damerey daily!
> 
> prompt: 'There will be boys who will tell you you’re beautiful, but only a few will see you.'

Rey has only one memory of her parents and it was the one the Kylo Ren inflicted on her, the one where her parents were crying over her, telling her to be brave and strong and that she would be safe on Jakku ( _safe_ was definitely not right word, more like hidden away and far from reach). 

But then after her fight with her grandfather - no, she refuses to call him that - _Palpatine_ , it seems like more memories of them are coming to her. She remembers smiling faces, loving embraces, little kisses on her nose and cheek, soft promises that they would love her forever, no matter where they were in the galaxy. 

Seeing those memories are a punch to the gut, a reminder of the sacrifices of a war that unwilling innocents had to participate in and a reminder of what she could have had. What she should have had, instead of having to grow up alone in a desolate wasteland with no one to call a friend. 

The memories come to her randomly, like when she’s spending time with BB-8 and D-0 or chatting with Rose and Finn over what to do next for the galaxy in huge looming senate rooms on Coruscant, sometimes at once or sometimes occurring multiple times throughout the day. And they always take her by surprise, but she tries her best not to show it. Finn knows something is up, especially with the way her Force signature changes, but he knows not to pry and to let her open up on her own time. (She really appreciates that about him)

Later on in the day, after getting the memory back, she does cry, silently and softly in the Falcon so no one can hear. Rey doesn’t want to worry the others, especially a _certain someone_ and Finn, and all she wants is someone to tell her that it would be alright and that it was okay to grieve the loss of parents you couldn’t remember until now. In the depths of her heart, she knows that Leia is there with her, trying to reassure her and enveloping her in warm hues of the Force, but she wishes that Leia was _actually_ there with her. 

Rey knows that a certain someone does notice her odd disappearances since he’s always there outside the Falcon after she comes out. 

The third time she gains another memory of her long lost family - she sees her father cooing over her as she giggles, singing her a little lullaby and trying to get her to go to sleep but he’s very much failing as evidenced by her continuous laughter - she sees him there, waiting awkwardly with nothing to do. Rey expects him to question her about why she went in there alone and if she’s okay (it’s something that he’s always done since the beginning of their friendship, and it wasn’t something he did exclusively with just her), but he doesn’t, just nods at her and talks to her normally as if she didn’t just cry and hide away for awhile. She wonders if he does want to know or maybe it’s because he understands it’s something that she needs to do on her own without anyone there. He’s like that too sometimes she’s noticed, quiet and reflective at some points, going off on his own. (It’s about the war, she knows that much. It’s seen clearly in his eyes and in the way he moves, pain and sadness oozing from every pore in his body and projecting itself heavily in the Force no matter how hard he tries to hide it) 

But maybe this is his way of saying it was going to be alright. 

On the tenth day of her continuously receiving memories, it happens to occur when she’s with _him_. They’re talking about their plans for the future; for him he plans to fly supplies out once the Resistance is done needing his help in forming a new government and she plans to set up a new Jedi temple somewhere with Finn to help her once he finds all the stormtroopers who were taken as babies with Jannah, Rose, and D-0 (he jokingly says that she should set it up on Tatooine, home of Master Luke, as a way to honor the legendary Jedi and she looks at him appalled before saying ‘There’s too much sand. It’s all coarse, and rough, and irritating. And it gets everywhere. Why would you think it would be the best place to honor Master Luke?” “It’s where he grew up!”) 

Then when his gorgeous big, brown eyes looks at her, it hits her then. 

She’s no longer in the middle of an empty hotel room in Coruscant. Instead she finds herself in a hut built oddly like Master Luke’s, made of grey stones, but definitely larger. There’s straw roofing, instead of the stone roof she was so used to on Ahch-To, and the hut seems well-lived in with a singular cot with multiple blankets strewn on it and bags placed in another corner. And there on the cot, she spies the doll that was so precious to her on Jakku, the X-wing doll. Rey makes her way towards it and she picks it up, remembering how fondly for years how this doll was her constant companion in the loneliest years of her life. 

She senses movement coming from outside and drops the doll in an attempt to hide that she wasn’t there until she remembers that no one can see her. There’s footsteps and before her very eyes, it’s her mum. She’s cradling her younger self close to her body, in such a protective manner it makes her heart hurt. 

Rey stills. After seeing so many memories of her parents, she’s still not used to seeing them, to actually hearing what they sound like and not used to the affection that she so badly wanted after the years they left her. 

“Mum,” her younger self asks, looking up at her mother with innocent eyes. “How did you know Dad was the one?”

Her mother chuckles. “You’re so curious little one. Well, your father saw me when no one else did.” 

“No one else could see you?” little Rey asks with eyes wide. “You were a ghost?” 

“No sweetheart,” her mother answers, putting her down on the cot. She gives the X-wing doll to little Rey and little Rey clutches it to her tight as she looks to her mother with anticipation. “He saw me in a way that no one else did.” 

“So he saw you were special?” little Rey concluded. 

“Yes little one. He saw I was special,” she said, sitting next to her. “Rey, my darling, there will be boys who will tell you they you’re beautiful, but only few will see you.” 

“See that I’m special?” little her asks. 

Her mother nods before nuzzling her. “That you’re so much more than you appear.” 

Rey tears up at the sight, taking the words to heart. She wishes she could remember the way her mother held her, the way her mother cuddled her close. And even though she was so focused on her mother, Rey could only think about one person, one person who she thinks has been seeing her from the moment they met or even earlier.

And then she’s no longer in the hut and she’s back with _him_ on Coruscant. 

Rey breathes heavily as if she’s come back from death, almost falling over from the position she’s in. He seems to catch on that maybe she wasn’t all there and he catches her by the shoulders before she could possibly fall over. 

“Hey,” he says to her, trying to ground her even though his voice obviously worried. “It’s okay Sunshine, you’re okay.” He’s not asking her to tell him what she just saw but he’s trying to just make her feel okay again. 

She looks up at him with eyes big, staring into his eyes. Rey’s searching for something in his eyes, to see if he really sees her. She immediately thought of him when her mother spoke, knowing that everytime, he would find her first and that he saw her when she thought she was worthless. And staring into his eyes now, she knows that he sees her more than anyone else and that he sees her more than just a pretty face. He knows who she truly is. He sees her for being just Rey. 

“Poe,” she says slowly, holding onto him. 

“Rey,” he says back, pushing away a stray hair from her face. “You’re okay. You’re going to be okay.” 

She cries then and she pulls him close to her, grateful for the words that she was longing to hear. He buries his face into her neck when she pulls him close, a sign of comfort she then realizes, and in her tears, she whispers to him, “We’re going to be okay.” 


End file.
